Sunday, August 19, 2012

Presenting a dialogue with my dangerously opinionated alter-ego and arch-rival blogger, GTOOSPHERE as we ponder over the deepest mysteries of urban living ...

WARNING: The authors intend this immature material for strictly TIME-PASS use only ... DO NOT (NAIVELY) EXPECT ANY KIND OF ACCURATE INFORMATION OR RESPONSIBLE WISDOM

Flawsophy: Cinema elaa undi? (How was the movie?)

Gtoosphere: Fast forward button lekunda choodadam kashtam babai (Like all other Telugu movies, it is hard to sit through without a fast-forward button)

Flawsophy: hehe … Why?

Gtoosphere: I don’t know but it’s the same shit all over again – the macho hero, the skimpily clad bimbette, the obviously evil villain who gets trashed by the hero… but not before he makes a trip to foreign country for a tax-credit for the producer. In a mandatory subplot, the hero insults the heroine but that borderline retarded female falls for the hero anyway. There is a good comedy track though :)

Flawsophy: hehe … yeah… if the comedy track clicks, they declare it a hit… I am surprised that people pay money, buy popcorn and sit through 2.5 hours of drivel for a 15 minutes of comedy and laughter… oka vaaram koncham opika padithe, adhedho youtube lo choodachhu gaa (why not wait for a damn week and watch them on Youtube. Spare yourself the pain and the money) … which is what I do :)

Gtoosphere: It's amazing how all social commentary has completely evaporated from movies… What’s worse is that middle class people and poor people have completely disappeared from the main plot. It's all about rich people with first world problems which are solved by his superpowers.

Flawsophy: Yeah… at most, the poor people are cast as side attractions where the heroine is shown to be helping them when the hero falls for her… you know, to establish that the North Indian heroine we hired is charitable sometimes and not always dressed up, shopping and eating out at expensive places ...

Gtoosphere: they are selling a lifestyle, le... showing that the hero is a cool guy who orders pizza... rides that bike, wears those brands…

Flawsophy: yeah…

Gtoosphere: Do you know how brand conscious folks in Rajahmundry have become?  I once overheard a group of students discuss in awe that a comedian’s apparel sponsor is Versace. Versace with the correct French pronunciation is not something you overhear in an Erra (government) bus near Peddapuram ;)

Flawsophy: it’s french ? … I didn’t know that … :)
Movies are two hour ads … with various products coming in and going

Gtoosphere: I am not surprised. George Carlin reserves the purest form of hatred when he says "these marketing pigs and advertising swine have turned us all into walking billboards"
Flawsophy: :)

Gtoosphere: Ileana went size zero for the movie. Gult guys are not impressed. Doesn’t fit anymore into the old fashioned South Indian plumpness mold...  

Flawsophy: wait … but, isn't she slim as it is already?

Gtoosphere: She is doing some Bollywood movie… it’s almost a requirement there

Flawsophy: to be size zero?

Gtoosphere: Yeah, the National media is now completely aligned with the western corporations. They are trying to sell an impossible idea of beauty – fairness, size zero, bikini bodies… who wears bikinis in India?

Flawsophy: Fat, middle aged, sunbathing western European aunties in Goa?

Gtoosphere: lol

Flawsophy: Yeah… the real product they seem to be selling is the people is dissatisfaction with their bodies. And it makes total sense for capitalism. Dissatisfaction and desire are GOOD FOR THE ECONOMY … the more the better. But, grasp the fact that it has reached the levels where they are selling whitening and tightening gels for lady-parts on primetime TV!

Link 2

Gtoosphere: yeah … I read about this. The only explanation I can think of for emergence of such products in Indian context is that perhaps all these multi-nationals organize something like a “Marketing Olympiad” where the exercise is to create demand for the most mis-fit product in a sizable market segment …  :)

besides, the whole beauty industry is all about that, isn't it?
1. Convince them they are ugly
2. Sell them some shit which will make them think or feel they look slightly better
3. Move on to the next body part
4. Repeat

Flawsophy: hmm …
Now, she is really a wonderful female...
Listen to that interview... she [Caitlin Moran] wrote a novel that’s a super hit in Britain

Gtoosphere: hmm

Flawsophy: listen to this:
 My perennial wondering is where are these women who can think for themselves? where ? Why don't I meet them often? :)

Gtoosphere: I always wonder too :)

Flawsophy: i bet an equal number of men would be turned on by these kind of things … same market … just the media and art instead of sexualizing them can portray women as beings with brains for 2 hours a week … and my guess is that a lot of people other than "High-School Bullies/Telugu movie hero" types may actually fall for that …  the economy would eventually improve …
but hey ... i am not complaining nor calling for a complete ban of all obscenity like a right-wing nut …  I just think it’s a better market strategy …

Gtoosphere: Why would they want people to think? A thinking consumer is a bad consumer! :P

Flawsophy: may be all of us don't want to visit a newspaper website for soft-core porno images … it's scary to open any newspaper website these days … as they have become soooo NSFW (Not Safe For Work). Why are Indian newspapers competing with dirty websites, that too on the Internet. There is a place for porn and there is a place for news and most sane people don't want the worlds to collide    Do these guys ever think about that ? :P

Gtoosphere: hehe … how low must the media think of the average reader: “I know this lustful dingbat very well. He likes his news served with extra cleavage on the side ?”

Flawsophy: It really boils down to the one-shop-stop model … This one-shop-stop model was started off by the likes of supermarkets and Walmart … who are trying to enter India now … In Walmart, you get everything from guns to gun-related injury medicine ... Guilty pleasure chocolates to make you fat and the exercise equipment to burn the same body fat … Paranormal romance novels involving sexy vampires and vampire costumes for your secret bedroom fetishes in the adjacent aisle … Indian English newspapers have the same model today. They think they SHOULD BE the only one who offer everything in a single outlet: News, Bollywood gossip, how to have sex like a porn-star, soft core clips, finally, religion and spirituality articles. It’s really because the economics of the newspaper industry has shifted from content-based revenues to ad-based revenue streams. Most media companies make money today from advertisements than sale of their product – the newspaper and its content. So, it’s not all media companies fault entirely since aam junta is never willing to pay for anything that is available on the internet … :-)

Gtoosphere: hmm … interesting … The funny thing is that the end result is that women are handed extra scoops of bull-crap … how is that fair ? :)

Flawsophy: ha ha 

Gtoosphere: yeah …

Flawsophy: The thing about walmart is that it is designed for convenience over quality … while you get the stuff for cheap ( because they can hire chinese prison camps at their will ), the stuff itself is of the shitty quality … The other day,  I had to buy a Starwars-theme blanket as seriously the blanket selection in walmart truly sucks … i mean the designs were so lame … and I thought starwars is  better …   it’s actually kind of cool. Now, people won't blame my aesthetic part of my brain for preferring a cheap product … they will blame my childish or nerdy parts of my brain … a decent trade-off …

Gtoosphere: This observation reminds me this guy … Charles Fishman … I think we talked about him before … The one who wrote the "The Walmart Effect"

Flawsophy:  No one is calling for shutting down of super-markets … It’s just that in the one-stop-shop philosophy of marketing, it’s the quality that always bites the bullet … No wonder, the same story is being repeated with the indian media as does a bad job at news, porn and everything in between …

Gtoosphere: hehe … actually … all of the reporting now has the quality as if Chetan Bhagat wrote them all … actually Chetan Bhagat working overtime :-)

Flawsophy:   ha ha …

Gtoosphere: yeahlook at this:

"Writer Chetan Bhagat has become synonymous with controversy. Close on the heels of his latest book release, What Young India Wants, he in the center of another storm .."

apparently … do you realize that no one is wrong or stupid anymore with any opinion … they are just "CONTROVERSIAL" … what lame-ass shit is this …

Flawsophy: hehe

Gtoosphere:  screw it, man … I gotta get ready ... get out and do some damage at work … :)


kaivalyam said...

I cannot believe this post has no comments! superior stuff - funny, informative and socially responsible. Keep going! You have managed to convert my anger at such disgusting products into laughter. That is some achievement!

Sash! said...

Thank you. But not many read our blogs, I guess :)

Seetha Bhagvat said...

I know this post is old but I had to comment about this quote:
"My perennial wondering is where are these women who can think for themselves? where ? Why don't I meet them often? :)"
If the only message women/girls hear their entire lives is one of patriarchy (from the media, family, friends), it is hard to break out of that cycle of thinking. Yes, some women don't explore the world beyond what is taught, same as some men, who also perpetuate these views. It's glib to throw away the effects of centuries of social conditioning with that quote. Caitlin Moran actually talks about this in the book she's promoting in that NPR interview. (It's a hilarious book, btw.) In fact, she's trying to get women to think beyond the messages society sends to them(us?). It's still an uphill battle, that some women choose to not fight.
My turn to be gilb: I'd chalk up the immaturity among young women to their youth. You try dating a bunch of sexist pigs in your early twenties, you'll be a feminist before you know it. So, you boys can hope to find strong women in a few years. [I am assuming you're both not in your late 20s yet. :-)]

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