Have you spotted these people at the Anna Hazare Protest?

An incomplete list of  typical profiles sighted at the Anna Hazare's anti-corruption rally in New Delhi ... 

1. PICKPOCKET

Of course, we have rules - No women and No Children. Although, we started making an exception for kids whom we can't trust them with their own smartphones - trying to catch up to the times, you see. We try go after any man with sunglasses, thick hair, dangling blue-tooth devices or earrings, rockstar t-shirts, sweaty bandanas, bulging pot bellies, expensive foreign sneakers, nerdy glasses, who's wearing pink or sucking on a lollipop, leather jackets or nose-pickers. If we can penetrate 10% of this market segment, we  declare a field day for us.   

No. I am not worried about ethics or stuff like that. Ask anyone out here if they want scams worth lakhs of crores by politicians or getting your pocket picked one day while protesting for the country's sake. The answer will reveal a lot about human nature. At least, I am not judging anyone. Now, if you excuse me … 

Courtesy: Pickpockets have a field day outside Tihar (THE HINDU)

2. AVERAGE JOE

Yes, I may have lied on my tax returns but it's not time for discussing personal moral dilemmas. Something larger than every individual is happening here. The morality of our great nation is at stake as this exciting chapter in our story of democracy is unfolding.  Twenty years from now, when I look back at this epic day ... What question do I want to ask myself : Is it "Was I there when my India needed me" (or) is it "Did I pay all my taxes" ?. The answer is simple. Jai Hind !!! 

Picture Courtesy: iyermatter.wordpress.com

3. MR. DEBATERS

News Anchor: Being a Congress party MP, how can you justify the UPA government's action of detaining Anna Hazare even before he began his fast on Tuesday to press for a stronger Lokpal bill? The government should recognize people's mood. Getting elected to power does not mean absolute freedom to do anything for five years. How are you handling the pressure to release Mr. Hazare after stupidly arresting him? Had Gandhiji been alive today …

MP: Hello. Hello. You media people are always big joke. Have you seen the movie Peepli [Live] ?

News Anchor: Peepli [Live] ?? By the way, that movie makes fun of everybody and the whole system including politicians.

MP: See, you didn't understand the movie at all. It shows what farce you media people always create.  For you media people, democracy and the country is a big joke to earn money from. I suggest you go and see that movie again.

News Anchor: For your kind information, I have seen the movie 2 times. 2 times and I remember every scene of it. Also, that is a fiction movie with a fabricated issue. Here, we as a news organization reporting on real concerns, real protests and real events. I am sure our viewers very well realize our commitment to bringing the true stories to the fore. By the way, why are we even discussing about the movie ?

MP: <wink> <wink>

Courtesy: A conversation on the Times NOW news channel

4. MR.VALENTINO

I am super-thrilled. Check out this bad boy. Come. Look closer. Isn't it a beautiful ring? Just got it at Malani Jewelers-right across the street. … A solitaire diamond ring in 24 carat gold. Do you think she's going to love it? That's right. I am going to propose right here, right now, while the protest is going on. I have been waiting for the right moment for quite sometime now. I guess this is it.  She is always telling how proud she is to be an Indian. This could go down as the most patriotic proposal in the history of democratic India. Imagine what a great story I would have to tell our kids if we get engaged while protesting for a corrupt-free India. How do you think she would react? I mean, things are going totally ok between us although we have been having some arguments lately and all. I don't know. I am all confused now. May be this is the right thing to do. But, look at the ring. Isn't it something? Anyway, LET'S DO THIS and then we can take a break and celebrate. Wish me luck …  

5. IRONY MAN

... err ... Folks. Folks. If I may interrupt. It seems that now Anna Hazare has agreed for a 2 week fast instead of the initially advertised indefinite fast. I am puzzled as to if bargaining is allowed in this sort of thing? I thought we were going all the way. Whatever be the merits of holding government ransom by announcing that you won't eat till you get what you want, but when we have decided to put a gun to government's head that way, may be we should stick to our guns? What  is this negotiation business now? The whole point of threat is to hint at the possibility of a well-publicized death. Now, if that option is taken off the table, where's the gun now? Now, they will just wait out the two weeks - all because of a new-found adulthood pragmatism ?

Does it mean that the Congress has managed to pull this off somehow? Frickin' geniuses … 

6. NIHILISTIC HIPPIE

If you ask the majority of people around, they would say that they are here because they are tired of living in a corrupt world. That is where my fascination begins. No one can define precisely "corruption". If a businessman is overcharging for his service out of sheer greed, Is that ok?  If a mom offers a child a chocolate just to make him do his homework, Is that wrong? Who decides what is fair? Corruption can be only defined relative to what's fair i.e. collective moral standards of our society. But, I get it. What people here are precisely protesting is against the "deliberate misappropriation of public funds". But if you call it "deliberate misappropriation of public funds", people would look at you like a moron! We need something simple-sounding like "corruption". So, at best, "corruption" is a metaphysical concept like "God" and protest is like a religious ritual. Never underestimate religion - it makes us do stuff we would never understand.   

I am sorry what was the Question? oh ... Why am I here? To check out chicks, dude. Yes! I am the type who finds nationalist rage in a fine lady appealing. Sue me, OK?

7. OPPORTUNISTIC SOCIAL WORKER

No. I am not here to support Anna Hazare. But, we are here to organize a "Social Work and Charity Expo" right across the street. Since, thousands of people have already turned up here, we are just trying to take advantage of that and spread social peace in our special way. You will find almost 40 stalls trying to organize mini-rallies or protests over a range of issues like "Delhi SlutWalk Reprisal"; "Shammi Kapoor Death Mourners", "The Delhi Belly Movie Fanclub"; "Society for eco-friendly Popcorn at Multiplexes" etc. It's a completely non-political, carbon-free way to show that you care. Plus, we have a great selection of road-side chaat stalls, a huge giant-wheel and merry-go-rounds for kids, internet kiosks and a fireworks display is being planned as well. 

• Pictures were shamelessly pilfered from the Internet.

• Special Thanks to long-time collaborator - GTOOSPHERE.

• ALSO CHECK OUT: "What kind of Anna Hazare supporter are you?" 

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Why I love : The Michael Scott character of The Office (U.S.)

 

Why I consider Michael Scott of "The Office (U.S.)" the greatest sitcom character ever created (so far).

He thinks he is a young, good-looking, funny and smart person and that of course, everyone has no choice but to like him. To his coworkers, he repeatedly insists that he is a friend first, a boss second, and "probably an entertainer third". He considers his co-workers as "family members". He thinks he's a lovable boss who is trying to motivate his employees with a dash of humor. He even bought himself a mug that said, "World's Greatest Boss" which he delightfully treasures. 

But, he is none of these. In reality, he neither has friends nor a social life outside work. He falls for any woman who smiles at him twice. His co-workers don't think high of his abilities as a manager and consider him a regular nuisance. They do not invite him to any of their parties. His bosses have no faith in him. What more, he is abysmally inadequate in comprehending others' reaction towards him. That is Michael Scott, the regional manager at the Scranton, PA office of a mid-sized paper supply firm who bosses over a dozen other employees. He doesn't seem to get it that the others might differ with his definitions of awesomeness. But, Michael is not plain dumb and stupid. He is a people's person. He loves talking, making friends, joking around and seems to get his humor right with his clients. He values his employees as the most important asset and many a time, he is portrayed to genuinely care for his employees. His jovial and cordial persona once made him a star salesman for the company and led to his promotion as a manager. As Peter Principle would have it, the same old tricks that made him a good salesman would no longer work in his managerial capacity. With an insecure desperation to be liked by everyone, he repeatedly finds himself blurring the boundaries between professional and personal life which makes it harder for him to break a harsh news (reduction of benefits or firing an employee) or even make a simple decision on what to buy with the office budget surplus (To buy "new chairs" or a "new copier"). He champions himself as a “cool and funny” boss but never seems to realize the importance of context to comedy. Consequently, he constantly ends up frequently invoking a completely incongruent and insensitive racial, gender, age, disability or gay stereotypes much to the chagrin of everybody around. This colorful contradiction of being fundamentally simple-hearted along with his dismal lack of control over actions and helpless self-indulgence made him instantly lovable and captivating TV characters of American Television. Among a multitude of misplaced contexts, pitiable gaffes, unintended seriousness and beautiful "Inappropriocity" do we find a glorious treasure of subtle humor and biting satire on humanity itself.

The most marvelous aspect of the show is how the writers have authenticated such flexibility in a character. They managed to create a character who can be anything, be it funny, naïve, misinformed, smart, stupid, evil, nice, sweet, rude, vulgar, flirty, insecure, shallow and sometimes even correct - and made it look totally believable. Steve Carell who plays Michael Scott, himself said that the character can "get away with saying anything". To pack in so much of diversity in a fictitious character is a stroke of genius as far as the art of comedy is concerned. This is exactly why I feel Michael Scott is artistically one of the greatest sitcom characters of all time.

LET'S GET A LITTLE PHILOSOPHICAL. SHALL WE?

Probably, the biggest reason why I love the character is his self-delusion and utter lack of self-awareness. No other work was able to point out to me as effectively as "The Office" of my own delusions and prompting me for the first time to question my own self-images. He represents a delightful comedic metaphor for our imposed blindness onto ourselves reminding us how easy it is to rationalize any of our actions and thoughts as long as we are using clever euphemisms. 

 

 

He is a hyperbolic caricature of a person refusing to break open and crawl out his own shell of world-views and self-indulgences. The hilarious awkwardness that ensues when Michael making fun of Kelly Kapoor by speaking in an annoying Indian accent or when he tries to dress up as a "Fat Mike" (in a partially inflated Sumo fighting suit that he bought for himself) to make a point on obesity is so reminiscent of our constant yet reluctant struggle within us to put on an acceptable reaction all the while being cautious not to offend anyone on any kind of personal identities be it sexual, religious, racial or political etc. The particular scene where Michael tries to kiss Oscar (who is gay) in order to prove that he doesn't discriminate against gay people is possibly my most favorite philosophical moment of the show. Not only does it parody our paradoxical urgency to prove that we "care”, it also demonstrates the shallowness of our ways to declare our open-mindedness. We notice how farcical we are if you see any of those ads by the oil companies saying that they are trying to be "green" while mocking the climate-change research or lobbying against renewable energy (or) when the plastic bottles/e-waste from your neighborhood recycling bins end up on theroad-side of a third-world country. Our reactions to ecological degradation, climate change or other people’s religions and culture are a classic example of similar hypocrisy that we drape ourselves with. When Michael passes off a double-entendres on his assistant ("Unbutton that top button. Let those things breathe"), it surely makes us laugh, but also nervously reminds us of the implied metaphors of how the popular media culture has somehow okayed the objectification of women.

Another celebrated motif that runs distinctively through "The Office" is Michael's lack of motivation and seriousness in his job. One employee describes his managerial style as "80% distracting others; 19% procrastination; 1% critical thinking". His real heroes in life are always comedians ("The day Steve Martin dies will be the worst day of my life"). His secret dream is to be a screenwriter, an improv artist and sell comedy albums:

Even though he didn't have the time to pursue the dream, he could never let go off this obsession and ended up imagining himself as the office comedian. We know what a disaster that can be given his persona although he does seem to have a good sense of humor and is extremely knowledgeable about comedy.  This is probably where Michael enjoys a cordial empathy from the audiences as many of us find ourselves in jobs we really may not care deeply about and similar struggle to come to terms with constant haunting of secret dreams and compromised ambitions. The universal workplace paradox of being mired in the illimitable boredom of job-routine makes us helplessly laugh and yet we secretly pine along with him for his longing till a realization dawns on us on we may not be all alone in seeking self-delusion, after all.

We may laugh at him, pity him or cheer for him. But, it is impossible to ignore the Michael Scotts amongst all of us and in our society as a whole. “Micheal Scott” is a brilliant thought-experiment of how a person would be if he completely lacked perspective. The comedic exaggerations and absurdities of "The Office" do form an emphatic argument for growing self-indulgence and erosion of perspectives in our times. To me, "The Office" will always remain a special inspiration. Ricky Gervais (the original genius behind "The Office") majored in Philosophy (although he did it to free his time to make it in his music career) and it's hard to miss the philosophical underpinnings in the show.

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