Monday, May 09, 2011

What comes back ... goes around?

The funniest part about USA killing Osama Bin Laden on Pakistan's soil is that overnight India is being called a W-I-M-P - no no … not the "Weakly Interacting Massive Particles" of the dark energy physics (although quite appropriate)  but wimp as in a coward, a sissy and a wuss !!! Suddenly, the Indian government is clueless and is facing the heat just because someone else successfully avenged a terrorist attack  in their own country after 10 years. Absolutely no fault and yet out-of-the-goddamn-blue everyone is just blasting you. This is exactly like in your school days your mom suddenly rushes red-faced into the room as you are enjoying the evening TV … Never mind the description take a look …


Anyhow, no one is more nervous in their pants today than Pakistan.  Those sweet days of pretense filled with idyllic, leisurely idleness of staying totally "Available" on Google Talk with the status, "Very Busy. Do not disturb" have to end soon. Gilani has stooped down to blaming the USA for having helped create the Al-Qaida in the first place. The Hindu reports:

The United States was reminded of its own role in the creation of the al-Qaeda by Pakistan Prime Minister Syed Yusuf Raza Gilani on Monday while picking up cudgels in Parliament for the armed forces and the Inter Services Intelligence (ISI), which are under attack from all quarters for the presence of Osama bin Laden in the country and the covert American operation that killed him.

Not just Gilani, a lot of TV pundits and other people are not passing up the opportunity to recollect that it's all America's fault in the first place for having made Osama Bin Laden a monster and then ... BANG !!! BANG!!! … shot him in the face. This is an interesting point of view but only because it is boringly redundant. Can we blame the "over-competitive society and the liberal gun laws" if some loon breaks out opening fire in public ? Well … May be …  on some level of abstraction, the argument can be justified but isn't it kind of obvious? Every action we do is a reaction to something … so what is the mystery?  You lose your keys and you start searching to find them.  If you find them after 10 years, trust me, there's a good chance you won't be excited. So, I believe there ought to be an expiry-date for using the reason "Hey, it was your mess in the first place, don't blame me … not my fault".

The Zero-Sum Strategy

A careful examination into our lives can reveal almost in 5 seconds that we are our major problem. So, an enormous amount of time and energy is justifiably spent in damage control every day. That's the good news. What's really amusing to me is that we have evolved, in this day and age, to celebrate the fact that somehow rectifying ourselves is a success in itself. In daily life, business and politics, congratulating ourselves for having solved the problem we are solely responsible for happens more often than you think. I call it the "Zero-sum strategy".

How else can you explain the following extreme behavior ...


Burger King is coming up with a new restricted calorie diets and advertising "aimed" at children. Hey, you are the ones who started endangering our species with your 1500 calorie burgers and the "Have it your way - make it a whopper" ads, in the first place ...

…  John Thain, the ex-CEO of Merryl Lynch gifted himself a $1 million office redecoration that included a $87000 office rug and a  $1400 dust-bin -  all for saving the company from bankruptcy following some disastrous investments that caused the 2008 recession in the first place. He sold the company away to Bank of America - that's what the party is for.


… The Indian National Congress led UPA unfolded a  "5-point plan to fight corruption" in December 2010. That's how it works, folks. These super-scamsters with their impressive resumes are really going to decide how to fight corruption. Any chance for my one-point plan:  "Get out of the office".

… The ultimate winner of this contest has to be the "Burqini". Why ban the bikini? And why wear the burqa? And then why create a cross between the bikini and burqa ? Beats me !!!


Folks, all it needs is the precise ability to decontextualize the success such a way that people won't complain. The "Zero-Sum Strategy" works like a charm because of one decisive advantage : "You are the problem". Given the cutesy-shallowness of the male culture, I bet 9 out of 10 men will choose to be in a relationship where they are the main problem for their partner rather she having "other/external" problems. The reason is simple: rectifying yourself is much easier after creating low levels of expectations than solving issues that involve other people or things.

Take care.

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By the way, are you checking out the FLAWSOPHY'S EVIL TWIN? Look what's he's been up to lately ...



5 comments :

ruhisonal said...

Brilliant article. Humorous, even though it tackles a very serious issue... that too with such finesse. Terrorism is like a frankenstein monster, and so are most of our modern day problems.

Sash! said...

@ruhisonal: thanks ... indeed ... but that's the easy explanation ... :P

Sash! said...

@ruhi: Thanks ... indeed ... everything is a reaction to something ... so ... the real question is where do we draw the line of responsibility and accountability !!!

Sanket said...

Totally loved the humour; I could almost sense the poker-face in the writing. Socrates would have been proud of the ironies you pointed out.

Sanket said...

Totally loved the humour; I could almost sense the poker-face in the writing. Socrates would have been proud of the ironies you pointed out.

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