Saturday, March 19, 2011

For the first time ever in the history of blogging, we present a blog album … a blog styled as rock and roll music albums. The blog album is titled "Flawsophy" itself as a tribute (since, I suck at the actual music thingy) to my favorite rock bands - Dire Straits and Led Zeppelin who had albums with their band name itself. Check out the album art:

Flawsophy - A Blog Album - Album Art

1. Down the Sillytown

I really, really don't know what my problem with life is. And guess what, I have lost all interest in trying to know about it.

Here's something that would make feel me great - Someone feeling jealous of me. Come on, people, admit it. You can't have a problem with that !!!

The most urgent, interim superpower I always wanted is the ability to induce the bad luck in other's life according to my wish

One time a girl tried to convince me that wearing sunglasses actually improves the vision on a bright, sunny day. While at that time I just nodded, I still seriously have my doubts.

Hey, I am all for cultural integration, but if someone poses in front of the Taj Mahal in a Metallica T-Shirt, it does look a little weird.

I am not satisfied with people doing their best. Infact, they should be doing more than their best. Doing your best is so commonplace these days that it recently replaced the standards of mediocrity.

I hate the squish sound the ketchup bottle makes, the first time you try to squeeze it, if you are using it after a long time - it's not the sound of the universe, it is a disgusting sound created by idle air pressure in man-made plastic bottle - JUST CAN'T STAND IT !!!

  Intelligence is (also) like beauty - enjoy while it lasts.


2. Flawsophize me

  Philosophers and scientists would like you to believe that no one is in control and everything happens without a particular planning or central authority but make no mistake, folks … while that may be true for grander and broader trends like birth of a universe, evolution of life etc., our lives are definitely affected by planning at least to a considerable extent.  So, just boldly go wait around her house for 3 hrs and act as if you just ran into her by sheer coincidence  - always remember the old wisdom from the colonial period : "a little guile can help you earn more than your share".

  There is this one more problem with the world : people thinking that they need not listen to other people. Instead, you should heed to every opinion by everyone you meet personally and change your personality accordingly … something tells me that a lot of good will come your way. But, you know what, people are unlikely to do that. The answer : Genes.

  The real problem no one talks about is that there are only 24 hrs a day … in fact, some people twist that around and say "you got only 24 hours. Make good use of it" as if it's my problem. Let's collectively blame position of the sun and cheer for more moon !!! Peace.

  One good news is that there must be situations where you can't be a jerk - I think it is impossible to be a jerk all the time because it violates some law of absolutism …

  I suspect the difference between an "untruth" and a "lie" is completely made up. Let me save sometime with a little secret : they have always been the same but the difference was amplified to divide the society for a cheap political gain.

  Here's another cliché that no one follows: "PRACTICE WHAT  YOU PREACH". If everybody is practicing what they preach, what about team-work and the delegation of responsibilities? Besides, what will happen to all my MBA training? What about it? In fact, something tells me that the world will be a lot better with less preaching and more practicing.

3. People and Places

  I think these 24x7 news channels' main target audience are the other 24x7 news channels in that region. Else, how can you explain the outrageous programming? It's like every news-channel is trying to say to the others, "Hey, look at me. See what I can do" - kind of like the supermodels on ramp in a fashion show strutting wares to each other. Naturally, various cultures have different ways to adapt to this existential competitive environment - while some news channels have gravitated towards naked news programming, other countries are seeing the journalists striking deals with the law-makers.

  What is a Buddhist extremist like? He'd probably say, "Listen, I am going to lock myself in that room for 30 days - no food, water or air. Don't ever disturb me, even if you die … ".

  Do you think some guy somewhere in Afghanistan just pretended to agree with the whole of Taliban & their Sharia Law stuff just to make his girlfriend break up with him (What's worse is that the ploy could have worked, considering Taliban's opinion on women).

  I don't think we do enough fuss over signatures as we could be doing. For example, can I have a signature that would end up being socially unacceptable (due to some kind of unintended profanity) ?  Why can't we have a signature that takes 5 minutes to complete it while the coffee shop lady and the customers behind can just wait while I show my sketching skills along with paying with my credit card ? Also, Did you also observe that no one appreciates the effort even if you have a creative, very artistic signature? Why is that? After all, a signature is the only personal thing we don't do for ourselves, and we get nothing out of …

4. In the land of the free and the home of the brave ...

  It took me five years to appreciate the taste of a pretzel.

  Here's why America is awesome and down-to-earth: America is the only place where a well-dressed man in a crisp suit and tie would walk up and put some quarters in a vending machine, bends over to collect his packet of zoo crackers and starts munching them. I can never imagine my stereotypical image of a well-dressed European with anything less costly than a classy wine glass. He would probably eat his zoo crackers only after they are orderly arranged on a silver plate.

  I always wonder if on the same day, Osama Bin Laden gets captured; Israel and Palestine dissolve their geographical boundaries in a truce argument; Gay marriage is legalized; Someone invents a cool, new fuel cell that's proven beyond doubt to solve the world energy crisis; Michael Jackson comes back from the dead. Imagine all that happening during the Super Bowl half-time. Given that the American media, no matter how many camera crew and millions they got, can handle only one issue in a single day, I wonder which of the awesome breaking news-item will they all pick to tell us.

  The first thing that struck me when I landed in USA is the fact that petrol (gas) is way cheaper than drinking water. In 2006, it was close to $2 a gallon (59 cents per liter) and now it is about $3.5 a gallon (~ $1 per liter). A 600 ml bottle of water could cost you $1.5 - $1.8 even today. Sometimes, all you need a good foreign policy expert at home.

Hope you enjoyed Disc 1. In the comments' section, please let us know what your favorite tracks are.

!!!! COMING SOON : DISC 2 !!!!

5 comments :

g2 said...

George Carlin said something like this sometime... I wish there is an earthquake, a war, a hurricane all at the same time and want to see how the media prioritizes it!

Sash! said...

@ g2: dude ... I just can't help it ... i have given up ... he's possessed me ... I am haunted by his ghost ... (if that's true ... can't have a better privilage)

SRAVAN said...

@g2: Media prioritized the earthquake and tsunami over war...

naga purnima said...

Well talking about the signatures ….. a friend of mine had a different kind of signature. He used to write his name and then scratch a few lines 2-3 times over it. He has been identified with this signature for say 28yrs and later when he was applying for his passport the officer on seeing his application asked him whether he was sure to apply or not. My friend was puzzled …… the officer thought he was striking off the signature. And then finally he had to change his signature to a better visible one.

Now think if he scratches such sort of signature at a coffeeshop while paying with his credit card im sure the person at the counter would surely be puzzled whether to accept the transaction or not.

Sash! said...

@naga ... : ha ha ... see, i told ya ... there could be issues with signatures that no one discusses ... :)

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